Lighting is Everything

Every time I look in the mirror lately there seems to be something new to lament. A deepening wrinkle. A freshly emerging sunspot. A slackness to skin that was formerly taut. Have I always been so vain? Or is the very approach of the big five-oh making me just a wee bit paranoid about my appearance?


Whatever the reason, I find I have fewer and fewer of those “high five yourself in the mirror” moments these days. You know the feeling, when you get a new dress or perfect pair of pumps that make you want strut and twirl. You may not actually say so, but on some level you know you look good.


So I’m chatting with my plastic surgeon recently (O.K. not really but he’s the guy who does my Botox who happens to be a plastic surgeon). Anyhow, he passes me a hand mirror and asks if I mind if he “makes a few suggestions.” Sure I say, bracing myself. He very gently offers that I might consider an upper eyelid lift to get rid of that “tired look” and shave a few years off my apparently haggard appearance.


As he uses his thumbs to lift my drooping lids and show me what I might look like if I were fully awake, I have to admit I’m tempted. But then I remember that the reason I look tired is because I am tired. Bone tired. Everyday. All the time. There’s no surgery for that.

After stopping at the mall for a skin-tightening eye cream and a sugar-free vanilla latte, I go back to the office, pausing briefly to check my appearance in the poorly-lit bathroom. Now I look wired and tired.


My friend Helen and I discussed this very subject the other night as we sat in very flattering light admiring each other. She said she actually moves into better light for photos now that she knows what angles works for her. We joked about finding pocket lights that could be whipped out of our purses at a moment’s notice to chase away unwanted shadows and make sallow skin glow.


On the heels of that conversation, I came up with a few tips for all of us ladies of a certain age who want to avoid being blindsided by unflattering images of ourselves:


· Resist checking your reflection in windows of any kind. If you do, you will find yourself thinking things like “when did I get a double chin?” for the rest of the day.
· Avoid last minute makeup checks in rear view mirrors. Your lipstick is fine but you’re likely to find one of those long granny hairs sprouting from your chin. And you won’t have tweezers.
· Do not look at your thighs in three-way dressing room mirrors. These are sadistic trick mirrors that add pounds and cellulite where none previously existed. I can’t prove it but just go with me on this.
· When plucking eyebrows, skip the magnifying mirror. You will frighten yourself silly. Just make a waxing appointment – it’s easier on the psyche.


Lastly, use the purse compact judiciously. Mirrors that small are ok for looking at portions of your face, like your lips, for instance, or a lone freckle. Holding it at arms length to get a full face view tends not to be pretty.


Then again, it could just be the lighting.